Wednesday, November 18, 2009

So i was talking to my friend about relationships...and we just went on for hours talking and talking and talking..after all I've realized we both quite vented a little too much (not in a bad way of course),  but i was amaze on how much i had to say! it was actually funny once i read the whole convo again... i mean i do love  writing and sometimes talking -depending on who i am talking to-.. well anyways,we actually both wrote some pretty good stuff, basically we were free-styling our thoughts and feelings, that's what i would call it..if their is any names mentioned they are not at all the real names the conversation consisted of..and of course i edited the words and made it a little more "professional" as some would call it....however,  i thought "should i somehow put this all together and just make a new blog"? ... i was thinking about it for a couple of  days because again people tend to be too damn judgmental when they read these type of things, but its my can choose to read it or not...HERE IT IS!.. enjoy.. me..hate me..adore me..=)

Novemer 17 2009.
6:O5 pm.

"Well you do gotta learn how to be fair... life is unfair sometimes it takes something very drastic to change and that's Wat he's caused you to do.. don't you think?...i do think so..but He's my everything, to me literally.... my everything my whole life is just him him him know it feels like i lost myself somewhere in there.. i try my best to make him happy too...i  understand and see i know im not perfect but i always tell him...."Erick you took my trust for granted and i do believe you've changed but its just the way it is and this is how it is now.i still love you"... and i feel like it's a little too late for me to be the same way again..i believe the things he tells me now but i always doubt him..he's been the best I've ever had but in reality we just have to be independent ...i gotta let him go, just be me... i hate depending on him for my happiness...i think to myself "damn i can really be happy alone i don't need anyone..i dont need him at all, i don't need to cry, or be sad..i need to realize how much i am worth"......yes exactly!, all of these guys their all fake they make up a character when they meet a girl...they play a role ...oh yeah the role of the "nice guy" ...a totally different role than who they really are...but when you love someone not caring is hard.. you start picturing yourself with other people and you think "wow i can be happy like this" but then u picture them with someone else and your like "no i wont be"... so selfish!!!...but its not a one way street is a two way street...if someone in the relationship chooses to be happy  like that the other person has the right to do the same...were all so unfair is sick...and why does it have to be this way, so stupid and complicated....yeah but think about it if it wasn't complicated it wouldn't be a challenge...and we would get bored..we would get bored of the happiness of everything being "oh so perfect" .....OK, so then this is love right?.... well i don't know is hard to understand...."

 i LOVE this!!!! ♥

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